Pilots Prevent
August 31, 2021
The whole world is weathering the COVID-19 pandemic at the same time, and yet the experience is different from continent to continent, country to country, even person to person. It affects us all, but it affects each individual differently.
That’s why, as we adjust to life together on The Bluff, it helps to remember we’re all in this together, but our journeys aren’t the same. We all need to give ourselves and each other the space to get our feet under us during this transitional time, and the grace to do so without judgement.
“We’re all trying to figure out what this new normal is going to look like,” says Carol Dell’Oliver, psychologist and director of the Health and Counseling center. “We have to allow ourselves time to gradually adjust, and be gentle in our expectations as we come back.”
Give Yourself a Break
One key part of that is checking in with ourselves throughout the day. “For those who were working remotely, we were sitting in the comforts of our own homes. We’re not used to these long stretches of work at the office,” Dell’Oliver says. “Pause for a moment and ask yourself, how am I doing physically? How am I doing emotionally? What do I need today? It can be simple. It can be that you're really thirsty and you haven’t taken a break in a while.
Fr. Jim Gallagher, director of Campus Ministry, says that “reflecting on the beneficial habits and patterns of last year can be helpful.” If you took more breaks or walks while at home, try breaking up the day into more manageable pieces with walks around campus. “The key thing is to trust our feelings. If we’re feeling restless, notice something’s going on there. If we’re feeling worn down, notice that.”
Find Connection
We can also embrace the positives that come along with being back together in person — namely support and connection with each other — and intentionally build on those experiences.
“It’s very important for us to feel connected to our work community,” says Dell’Oliver. “We’ve been without that for quite some time. We can ask ourselves, ‘What can I do right now to cultivate connection?’ It can be as simple as inviting someone in another department for tea or coffee. Or going for a walk with someone. It’s an opportunity to gradually build that social connection.”
Respect Each Other
At the same time, we have to remember some people might not be ready to get back into the social swing of things. If your invite is turned down, don’t take it personally. And when we do get together, don’t assume everyone’s ready for a hug and a handshake, or is comfortable taking their mask off outside.
“We need to be more deliberate in our actions with folks, and ask about people’s comfort levels in ways we wouldn’t have felt the need to before,” says Fr. Jim.
“Consent can stretch beyond a narrow understanding. It’s about not assuming things about other people. Now calls for a more deliberate asking of permission than what was there in the past.”
Be Patient
Even though we’re back amid the hustle and bustle of campus, we might find ourselves struggling with focus and productivity. There are lots of distractions fighting for our attention. “Rather than assuming we can get back to our pre-COVID level of functioning right away, we might need to rehearse the skills and duties we have,” says Dell’Oliver.
That might mean giving yourself extra time to prepare for a meeting or a test, and not getting hung up on mistakes when things don’t go smoothly. By the same token, it might mean giving others in our orbit a bit more understanding when details get inadvertently overlooked or our emails are met with crickets.
“One of the key things right now is patience with one another, but being patient is not just acting in a way that respects others,” says Fr. Jim, “it’s restraining from judgement as well. It’s remembering that people are coming from different places. Give them space to be where they are. There might be things at play that we're not aware of or don't see.”
Look for Help
Clearly, there’s no shortage of worrying news these days, but it weighs on people differently. “Don’t assume that other people have dealt with the challenges the same ways you have,” says Dell’Oliver. “There are a lot of struggles, but people don’t often want to expose them in a work or school environment, so it could be an invisible concern. Check in with the people around you. Let them know you're available if they need to talk or problem solve.”
For professional help, students can reach out to the HCC for counseling or Campus Ministry for emotional support, and employees can tap their EAP benefits. But there are loads of self-help resources on the HCC website too, including links to podcasts, articles, and videos covering topics like coping with coronavirus anxiety, grief and loss, or self-care and intuitive breathing.
“It’s important to learn how to kindly acknowledge your own feelings and thoughts,” says Dell’Oliver. “Then you can commit to effective actions to improve the situation.”
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